Loosing faith

Contradicting self, being envious .. wearing a false mask .. the so called social politics which emerges out of an urge to succeed and your own selfish thought, wherein even your co-mates arent spared. Each day you go into office and you are either trapped into these circumstances or you frame one. Now thats a harsh reality though.

Lets say you are amongst a team of 4 wherein each person talks to individually .. and words change quite often. Its hard to find truth or believe. Whom wud you believe ... A B C or D .. Poor i cant find a reason to such a behaviour .. afterall what is the reason behind such an activity? You have to be within the PEOPLE .. and you know you arent going to take back anything .. you would die alone .. why the hell do you hate people? Then why is it hard for you to sacrifice .. why is it hard to tell the truth .. why is it so easy for you to defame ... plot plans against others .. Is it mere bucks .. mere hike .. which motivates you to ditch your co-human beings.

Where am i heading .. what am i doing .. i dont know ... walking on an unseen belief to see it happen .. still having faith on people who have been unfaithful. Its all fake. Quite hard to understand .. Trying hard to prove others point which i believe the least.

I am reallie sorrie but trust me ... am loosing faith .. faith on commitments .. faith on people .. God forbid that.

I advocate being NUMB and Psycologically impaired; put in an Asylum than being amongst the smart competitive crowd. At least the man who is looked upon as mad or is psycologically impaired is in his own world which is not penetrated hate or selfish motives we have amongst us. This man is on rags .. doesnt know how the food tastes .. lives on but with no reason other than his dellusional world. The world he has crafted.

Isnt he in a better state than we logically sound people are?